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The child does not want to go to kindergarten ...


The first days in kindergarten can be difficult. You have to be prepared for it. Especially on the so-called rebellion on the third day, which manifests itself in the fact that the toddler refuses to go to kindergarten, because he states that it is better at home, however. What can a wise parent do?

The only solution is to endure this difficult time and under no circumstances succumb to persuasion of the child staying at home. Psychologists emphasize that this is the worst solution possible. Although it will probably be difficult, you need to escort the toddler to kindergarten, say goodbye quickly and stay in touch with childminders. Remembering not to call the school every few minutes, which even the most qualified teaching staff can't stand.

Why is this so difficult?

Children about two or three years old are guided two extreme needs. One of them is the need to explore the surrounding world by experiencing new situations. Therefore, in this respect, going to kindergarten, where you can meet new children, play with them and take advantage of the suggestions of babysitters is tempting. On the other hand, the child has a strong need to be accepted and to be around his loved ones, which allows him to feel safe. In the toddler's eyes, the best solution would be to reconcile these two needs. That is why children often use different methods to ask their parents to stay with them and let them play in kindergarten. However, such a solution, which would accept even a lot of mothers and daddies, is not able to gain the approval of preschoolers. And of course this should be considered a good choice.

The first days in kindergarten are behind us. Perhaps many parents met with rebellion before leaving home. Maybe the first days were over in tears and hysteria ... Also in this respect, however, preventive action counts. Therefore, parents of next year's preschoolers should already think about ...

Don't scare your child with kindergarten

The main thing is not to scare the child with kindergarten or later with school. Saying "in kindergarten you will find out" we hurt the child. Sure, sometimes we are controlled by nerves, frustration, stress, but it is worth controlling it. The child will remember the words spoken in this way for a long time, and unfortunately we can observe the effects of this in the future.

In the moment of educational helplessness we should not reach for a weapon in the form of scaring.

Appropriate preparation

When a child refuses to go to kindergarten, psychologists are convinced that the milk has already spilled. This usually means that parents neglected certain activities that should have been planned in advance.

In the preschool preparation process, it counts slow adaptation. It is best a few months before your child goes to kindergarten to ask about adaptation classes in which children and parents participate and which allow them to deal with the fears of both. In such classes, the child can meet future colleagues and future tutors. It is also worth taking advantage of the time of walks, showing your child (once we get a positive response from the facility) where he will go to kindergarten and what it will involve. Such conversations should be as natural as possible and carried out without any "mousse" and special preparations.

Let us remember that each change requires time, which is why it is so important to spread the adaptation process over a long time. You have to get used to everything. The same principle applies to both adults and children.

Some important tips

If the kindergarten staff does not mind, we can allow the child to take a substitute element of attachment to the kindergarten. It can be, for example, your favorite cuddly or blanket or pillow.

When a crisis occurs, psychologists recommend not paying too much attention to it. Of course, the child should be observed, but do not discuss the topic too much, because in this way we will achieve the opposite effect to the intended one. It's best not to ask, not discuss, but be close. It is also strange to ask before leaving kindergarten that the child does not cry. Let's not say goodbye to emotions with long breakups. It's really enough to kiss, wave and leave the kindergarten. Nothing is wrong with our child, and the adaptation process is a transient time that you just have to survive.